I no stay Hong Kong too much and there so many food bloggers writing to tell you what food is grand. I so feel happy because they make me feel empowered, or is it end-powered?
I had lunch with cat woman foody and she show me blog by someone who no get good service. That blogger so loud say "I am food blogger!" And get box of France round cookie. No fat pastry cook Pierre Herme (oh oh oh! Two very grand brand Pierre Cardin and Hermes must be sponsor him. No wonder his recycle shopping bag sell so expensive, almost like my lambskin Repetto shopping bag) round cookie but restaurant made round cookie so the food blogger no write bad words. Tsk tsk tsk, food blogger still write bad lor.
So now I am back in Hong Kong, I ask Sweet Sweet Boyfriend to make me crystal encrusted case for my new Galaxy. Back say "I Am Food Blooger!" I am very grand lady and I no shout like other people. Grand crystal case, everyone can see.
Restaurants people if you read this, I tell you what to do for me so I no write bad thing about you. After all, I am big time food blogger. You need to please me!
- you always have stool for me. I finally learnt what stool mean in some other country. I mean one with four legs. You know what I am saying? Top no use unfinished wood. You think "raw", I say it no salad vegetables and I no need raw. Just don't scratch bottom of me bag. They very nice designer limit edition. You people no afford, ok? Leather or silk covered cushion ok.
- 4 ply toilet paper. I no understand why people use rough toilet paper. I use nice hand cream, you know?
- Diptyque product in toilet when I go. No like smelling other perfume
- if you last order at 2pm but I show up 2:15pm because I no find matching shoes for me bag, you let me order. I am food blogger or I write you no give service!
- I no eat bacon in my bacon egg sandwich. Egg is egg white only because I want size 2. You no tell me that is not bacon egg sandwich. Customer is always right!
- have your PR ready and they better know food and fashion good like I do. I no like talk to people no dress good
- if food no serve the way I want, you bring back to kitchen and give me new food, free of charge
- of course you invite me to your restaurant and you give me goody bag to bring home. If too big, you arrange for delivery. No grand girl carry bag or basket in shopping mall.
I am still jetlag and cannot think too much. You no need worry, I will post more when I start eating again.
Watch our, I AM FOOD BLOGGER!!